A brief ponder

It has apparently been so long since I've been out with anyone that one of my friends asked me if I was gay last night. That was a bit of a shock. After I'd coughed up all the beer that had mistakenly entered my lungs I asked him why, and he said it was just a thought. Obviously I wanted to know where this came from so he told me I was funny, a good dresser and I got on well with women, whether I wanted to shag them or not. Isn't that a good thing? Something a bloke should be, regardless of sexual orientation? The person concerned is one of life's predators, so I can forgive him. I can't understand how he works, so why should I be surprised that he can't understand me? For the record, I'm not gay. I find women far too interesting for that. This episode has served to convince me that maybe some affirmative action is necessary. Maybe I should stop waiting for the right one to come along and just have some fun with a string of wrong ones? Anyone got a manual? I wasn't very good at this to begin with, and now I've been out of practice for nearly 4 years, I suspect any pulling skills I ever had have atrophied to the point of total failure. I did look for someone last night, primarily to prove a point I suppose, but my heart really wasn't in it and all I could see was whore after painted whore. *sigh*.

Tips would be appreciated, except from Dave, who is at least as bad at this as I am :)

Stolen shamelessly from isihac

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This isn't quite accurate, but it's appropriate enough that I don't mind.